Stop Wating ~ Start Dating!

Archive for the ‘romance’ Category

Balance In All Things ~ Wordless Wednesday

Balance In All Things

Don’t Stop Believing~Seek and Ye Shall Find.

I’m taking a short cut and reposting on of my favorite articles from my first blog attempt. As I have worked with singles for the past decade I’ve noticed how bitterness about a failed relationship can hold people in a state of limbo where they just can’t begin a new with someone else. They believe that they are destined to never find a good person and this belief is a self fulfilling prophesy. They make the same bad choices again and again. They enter a relationship with the same bad attitude; believing it will fail or that there is just no such things as a good man or woman. I honestly think most of the trouble people have with relationships start with their attitude before they ever even get in.

Ever wished you could find the perfect man ? Someone who wanted to fulfill your ever wish or dream. A prince of a man who wanted nothing more than to make you happy. Are you so jaded after dating for so many years or after a nasty break-up that you doubt that such a man exists. Have you ever stopped to think that he maybe like Santa Claus in a way.  You stop believing in the magic so he no longer exists. You stopped writing to him and searching for him in the sky on Christmas Eve. Maybe you can’t find him because you no longer believe he is out there.

Bitterness can blind you if you let it . It can make you lose the ability to see someone delightful because you are too busy looking for the flaws. Disillusionment can turn you into an angry old spinster of a character. Rather certain Mr Right would be frightened off by her too. Maybe Mr Wonderful needs you to sit in his lap and tell him what it is you want and believe that he wants you to have it. You may wake up and find everything you had wished for right before your eyes. If you can still believe that Mr Right exists like you believed that Santa Claus did when you were a child.

“Love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love.” – Erich Fromm (1900-1980)

Don't Stop Believing~Seek and Ye Shall Find.

I’m taking a short cut and reposting on of my favorite articles from my first blog attempt. As I have worked with singles for the past decade I’ve noticed how bitterness about a failed relationship can hold people in a state of limbo where they just can’t begin a new with someone else. They believe that they are destined to never find a good person and this belief is a self fulfilling prophesy. They make the same bad choices again and again. They enter a relationship with the same bad attitude; believing it will fail or that there is just no such things as a good man or woman. I honestly think most of the trouble people have with relationships start with their attitude before they ever even get in.

Ever wished you could find the perfect man ? Someone who wanted to fulfill your ever wish or dream. A prince of a man who wanted nothing more than to make you happy. Are you so jaded after dating for so many years or after a nasty break-up that you doubt that such a man exists. Have you ever stopped to think that he maybe like Santa Claus in a way.  You stop believing in the magic so he no longer exists. You stopped writing to him and searching for him in the sky on Christmas Eve. Maybe you can’t find him because you no longer believe he is out there.

Bitterness can blind you if you let it . It can make you lose the ability to see someone delightful because you are too busy looking for the flaws. Disillusionment can turn you into an angry old spinster of a character. Rather certain Mr Right would be frightened off by her too. Maybe Mr Wonderful needs you to sit in his lap and tell him what it is you want and believe that he wants you to have it. You may wake up and find everything you had wished for right before your eyes. If you can still believe that Mr Right exists like you believed that Santa Claus did when you were a child.

“Love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love.” – Erich Fromm (1900-1980)

He Said,She Said, I Said~Barbara J. Peters

Relationships are complicated aren’t they? Romantic ones are most complex of all. Men and Women think and act so differently that often we fight and talk but never get to the bottom of the problem because we do not understand what we are even fighting about. Want some help? I met Barbara J. Peters through twitter and fell in love with her quotes. We began chatting and she asked me to read her book He Said,She Said, I Said. I was blown away by her insight into relationship and how similar our ideas about relationship and how to make them work were. No wonder I adored her tweets~ she was in my head!

You need to read this Book girls and boys whether you are in a relationship or single and looking. Barbara arms couples and individuals with the tools you need to have a successful relationship. Communication is key to being happy in any relationship. Without good communication a couple is doomed. I love the 7 keys to a successful relationship that Barbara includes in this book.

1 Communication

2 Trust

3 Forgiveness

4 Intimacy

5 Acceptance

6 Friendship

7 Love

This book is right on target teaching  how to work on a relationship to bring joy and love into your life through acceptance and forgiveness. Barbara has empowered her reads with this inspiring collection of he saids, she saids, and I saids.

And she leaves you with this thought……

Nothing worth anything ever comes easy”

A relationship that is worth having will take work but will be a blessing throughout your lifetime.

If you would like to purchase He said, She said, I said,

Author Barbara Peters Has a Bachelor Degree of Sociology, Bachelor of Science in Nursing, and a Masters of Science in Counseling, and her passion is working with couples .  She is also the Author of  The Gift Of A Lifetime, Building A Marriage That Lasts.

Online Dating~ Is It Safe?

Post from My dear friend and online dating expert AmericanCurvyGirl~ From the Blog RomancingTheWeb.com

I am often asked by people if Online Dating is safe.  I don’t blame people for being unsure about it because we hear stories and see things in the Media about some poor woman who was attacked or killed when she met a man from the internet.  The Media just loves a good Horror Story. That is how they make their living after all. If they keep us good and scared of “Online Stalkers and Predators”  we’re more likely to stay tuned so they can keep us safe.

My take on it is that for every one tragedy that comes from meeting someone online there is at least 1000 tragedies that happen when a woman meets a man at a bar, a dance club or any where for that matter. You see, when you meet someone online it’s okay to be cautious. It’s perfectly acceptable to get their name and address so you can leave it with your friend or maybe your mother.  Also, anyone smart will have spoken to each other on the phone quite a few times before deciding to meet.

Think about it.  When you meet someone online there is already a trail that can be followed in the event that something happens or you disappear.  The police will simply track the IP address from any emails or subpoena the dating site for any information they have.  If you are using a Dating Site that you both pay for there will also be credit card information that leads back to them.

To be honest I’m a cautious person myself. I don’t think I’d be out there using Craig’s List to meet people because I really would rather meet someone serious and grown up enough to use a real Dating Site.  However, should you choose that route for yourself you can still be safe.  Just get the person’s phone number and talk to them for a week or two before you decide to meet.  That way you know it’s probably not a stolen phone because it most likely would have been turned off within that amount of time.

When my friend Jayme met her husband Dave she even had his work number and had spoken to him at his office so she knew he was really who he said he was.  She was cautious and smart so she also told him outright that she had given a few of her friends his phone numbers as a safety net.  That is an excellent idea because we should never assume that a  killer or criminal is smart enough to realize that they would be easily caught.

If you just use caution and common sense you can make your Online Dating experience a very safe and secure adventure.  Of course I can’t guarantee you that there is nothing to fear. I mean there is always the possibility that you will have spinach in your teeth throughout all three courses. I’m sorry but you’re on your own when it comes to the really scary stuff.

She met her Husband online and they are still happily married. I spent a week on a cruise with this lovely loving couple. They are darling. It can happen for you too. Online dating can be safe if done wisely just like offline dating. Stop Wating Start Dating!!!

Can it really work? Dating Online from a distance

 

You found that one in a million online, the catch: they live a million miles away.
A long distance relationship is a hard one to make-work but with care and effort, they CAN work. I’ve seen it happen with my own eyes. I have several friends that met their spouse in romance chat rooms. They lived great distances apart but made the relationship work by keeping in constant communication. There are several Internet communication programs that can make staying in contact easy and fun.
It’s important to take time to contact each other every day. You can e-mail, talk on the phone, or use an instant messenger program. E-mail can become the modern version of love letters that your grandmother still has stored away except that it’s much faster than the old snail mail and more convenient. No need for a stamp just press send and they’ve got mail! How about an instant message?
Take the step to visit each other and make that time special. Tell your friends and family that you and your sweetheart want to spend this time alone. Try to make sure you have nothing else to do but spend time with each other and spend it wisely. If you don’t put in the effort to see each other you will drift apart no matter how much you love each other. A Relationship needs physical contact in order to stay strong and keep it together.
Trust is important in a long distance relationship. Try not to panic and worry every time you call and don’t get an answer. Don’t assume just because your sweetie went out with friends that he or she is cheating on you. Trust is the key here. You can’t keep someone chained to a phone or computer waiting for you but as long as they are making the effort to stay in contact with you, relax.

With work and a little effort a long distance relationship can work well. There’s something very romantic about people that are so far apart yet being devoted to each other. Just remember to take the time to stay in daily contact and it could blossom into something that can last a lifetime.

Study: Regrets? Women have a few, particularly in romance – Chicago Sun-Times

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Regrets from love lost are normal..regretting your present partner should not be. If your Romance is not working time to regroup and move on. Read this article and think about what you can do to fix or get over romantic regrets.
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